Kid Funnies From Facebook

Went through my Facebook history to journal some of my favorite Kid Funnies.

March 2010
My 10 year old son just told me, "Mom, I need someone a lot smarter than my family to play chess with." Thanks for rubbing it in.

April 2010
My boys are playing spys with walkie talkies. Code names: Nobody and Nobody in Particular.

May 2010
Just said by my 8 daughter: "I like deceiving. I like to joke with deceives." Yikes.

May 2010
The boys are doing archery in the backyard and just popped a yoga ball.

June 2010
Summer writing program for my boys: They do a full page of stream of consciousness, free writing then take it out back and burn it. Works for us.

June 2010
Conversation with 10 year old son tonight: "Mom, I've been thinking. Everything that I've ever done wrong in my life, isn't really my fault. I'm just too young to understand. It's really societies fault." 12 yo brother shouts form the kitchen: "Stop quoting Calvin and Hobbes!" 10yo son grins. That Calvin is a bad influence.

July 2010
Breakfast conversation this morning: 12 yo boy looking disdainfully at 8 yo sister, "Mom, this place is like a Smithsonian Institute exhibit for nutty girls." Mom: "Are you saying I'm in that exhibit, too?" Boy: "No, you're a nutty woman. That's a different exhibit."


Aug. 2010
Listening to my 8 year old's running commentary to herself while she is in the kitchen: "First I get a glass. Then I get a spoon. Now I get the chocolate and get the milk. Now I stir myself to chocolate milk happiness."


Sept. 2010
Corry is turning 13 tomorrow. He just told me, "Mom, I'm going to have some nachos and think about the meaning of life." He's growing up. :)


Jan. 2011
I was lying on the couch with a small dog, a medium cat and a big girl. All cozied up with a blanket. I also had a HUGE headache. A small girl with very chilly hands came up silently, massaged my head for a few minutes and just as silently slipped away. While it didn't completely cure my headache, it helped, and the thought was a cure in itself.

Jan. 2011
11 year old son just informed me of an experiment he conducted. Apparently he wanted to see how many times he could walk back and forth in front of his wii playing brother before his brother got annoyed and/or hit him. The answer was 24 times.

Feb. 2011
My husband's way of teaching our daughter how to drive: open a can of Dr. Pepper, put it in the cup holder and say, "The goal is to not spill this".

April 2011
"This movie makes me want to eat matzoh", says my 8 year old as she watches Charleton Heston in The Ten Commandments with a box of Streit's in her lap.

May 2011
9 year old daughter is playing a board game with a younger friend. I hear her explain, "No, you don't start counting with the space you're on. If you did that and rolled nothing but 1's you would never go anywhere."

Dec. 2011
My boys have the most patient scout master in the whole world. The conversation going on in the dining room is enough to drive anyone crazy. "So, boys what chores do you do for your family?" "We don't do chores." "You don't do anything to help around the house???" "Oh we do things all the time." Prompting from dad about mowing, taking out the trash, folding laundry and putting away, feeding animals, handyman stuff.... "Oh, but those aren't chores, we just do them cuz we have to." Um, ya, boys. Those are chores.

Jan. 2012
"I think that new 'gourmet' mac and cheese is too fancy for my taste buds. They're used to the cheap stuff." ~14 year old son


March 2012
I was making mac and cheese and 14 year old son was anxiously engaged in watching me stir with a plate in his hand. "So, what's the report?" he asks. "It's done!" "That's a good report!" "And praiseworthy", I say. "I seek after these things", he says as he scoops up his mac with a smile. :)